How to Create a Fresh Start This New Year That Lasts
January 4, 2023 9:00 AM EST | 7 min read
When creating a fresh start, people often have all kinds of limiting beliefs, but the New Year can be a motivating time to put those aside.
Thoughts like “I am too old to start fresh” or “It is impossible to start over” might run through your brain, but you can overcome these!
Change is integral to starting fresh, which is often scary for people.
However, just because it might be uncomfortable doesn’t mean you should pass up the opportunity to recreate your reality.
These tips will help you understand how to create a fresh start that lasts well into the year.
The first step is to identify what is holding you back and face it honestly.
Next, follow that up with some kind of action.
Finally, remain flexible and understand that a fresh start isn’t a destination…it’s a journey.
Identifying what is holding you back is the first step toward a fresh start
Figuring out what keeps you from starting over is the first step to creating a meaningful and lasting fresh start.
Understanding the challenges you will face before you begin enables you to be ready for them.
Is it fear?
Fear of change, fear of failure, and fear of success are all things you might encounter on your journey to a new you.
Change makes us feel uncomfortable simply because it is new.
It doesn’t make the doubts or concerns true, though.
Although many of us fear it, we should not shy away from failure.
Failing at something means you tried, which is a triumph in its own right.
Not succeeding at something the first few times gives you a chance to learn new skills, thought processes, and habits.
It teaches us to be better.
Fear of success is much more common than I think people realize.
Maybe you aren’t worried about failing, but you might succeed, bringing about more change.
It might change how much money you have or how people see you.
Will you like who you become if you achieve success?
Will your friends still be your friends?
These thoughts are once again centered on the uncomfortableness associated with change.
“You do not have to be fearless just don’t let fear stop you.” — Charlie Day, Motivational Speeches
How this knowledge can help you set up the groundwork for your fresh start
Let’s say you are worried about losing weight because you are concerned your relationship won’t be the same.
Honesty with yourself is essential, not only when starting over but for living the most authentic life possible.
Are your fears that your partner will not find you attractive?
Or are they because you are unhappy in your relationship and think you will choose differently if you have more options?
These are two very different things, but it isn’t the answer that will determine if you are successful.
The determining factor will be what you do with your honest answer.
If you are unhappy in your relationship, address those issues with your partner.
You don’t need to lose weight to be loved and happy in your relationship.
If you think you would do something different if you looked different, this relationship isn’t working for you.
Your options shouldn’t matter, but your self-worth should.
Discuss things you wish were different and see if communication helps resolve them.
You might end up losing weight and improving the relationship at the same time.
Or you might discover that it is time to move on and work on changing your image because you want to.
If you decide to lose weight and improve your health and your partner no longer finds you attractive, that’s ok.
People will be attracted to whatever they want to be attracted to.
However, you shouldn’t make yourself unhealthy or stay a certain way so someone else doesn’t leave you.
Facing this fear could mean you end up alone for a little while.
However, it might also mean that you inspire someone else to be healthier.
If that happens, you each get a fresh start for your health and experience new things that help you grow closer together.
Being real with yourself and true to who you are, makes up the building blocks for creating a fresh start that will last!
“The truth may hurt, but fooling yourself will enslave you.” ― Charles F. Glassman, Brain Drain The Breakthrough That Will Change Your Life
Changing your career path uses the same principles
When I first entered college, I wanted to be a journalist and write fiction novels.
I knew I wanted to write.
As a teenager, I dabbled with a blog in the 90s and got paid to write on the internet.
Then life happened, and I didn’t start college when I planned.
When I returned, I had a baby and decided I could only make college work if I went online.
I had worked in management positions for a few years and thought a degree in business administration would help me make more money.
So, that’s what I did.
I graduated with a bachelor’s degree and kept working in management roles.
I got a master’s degree in Management and Leadership.
My 20-year management career included restaurants, retail stores, and nonprofit organizations.
There were things I liked about it, but overall I was miserable.
I was living a life that never felt like the one I was meant to live.
The catalyst for a career change arose because I started being honest with myself.
I didn’t want to dress professionally every day.
Nor did I want to solve customer issues for most of my time.
I wanted to write.
The desire to help people develop and grow was still there, but I couldn’t keep doing it the same way I had.
I found the answers to the tough questions because I started a daily routine involving walking around the lake near my house daily.
This led to a level of introspection I hadn’t engaged in for years.
Joining a writing group came next, followed by a series of opportunities to self-publish my work and do work for clients.
It all started as a hobby.
A way to appease the part of me that wanted to write that I had buried.
Before I knew it, I made almost as much money as my full-time job in fewer hours.
I knew if I could devote more time to writing, the fear of not having enough money wouldn’t hold me back from leaving a career that depressed me.
Honesty has to lead to action; you will know when that moment happens.
A fresh start requires you to do something
Understanding what is holding you back and being honest are psychological steps to building a lasting fresh start.
They are crucial pieces, but nothing changes if nothing changes.
You can know that something is off in your relationships or your career.
However, until you do something, it will stay that way.
Now that “something” is entirely up to you.
Maybe you will start a new diet and exercise plan.
Maybe, you will fly to Mexico and have weight loss surgery.
You might decide to join a group based on a passion of yours.
If you do not know what to do, maybe you will find a therapist or a life coach and go from there.
You might re-enroll in school.
The action is different for everyone, but something needs to happen.
We have to take those first steps.
Those steps may not be the permanent or perfect solution
I don’t walk around the lake every single day anymore, and I don’t go to the monthly writing group (it disbanded).
However, now I spend my days in a career I love.
I went back to school for a Ph.D. in Psychology.
The road to a fresh start is curvy at its best, bumpy and treacherous at its worse.
We usually find the best scenery on those journeys and make the most memories.
“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I… I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” — Robert Frost
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