50 Smoking Quotes About America’s Favorite Vice

These smoking quotes will make you laugh, cry and think all at the same time.

Let us know what you thought about these smoking quotes using the comment section below!

Are you a smoker? Have you quit before?

Like anything, there are varied opinions on smoking.

From Mark Twain joking about his smoking vice to Patrick Swayze coming to terms with how smoking impacted his pancreatic cancer, you will find every side of the topic addressed.

Smoking has been around since the earliest days of humankind.

In fact, archaeologists have recently found evidence of tobacco use dating back over 3,300 years ago.

Charred seeds found in the Utah desert show evidence of the many uses for the plant.

For a long time, smoking was in fashion in America.

Some of the most iconic movies and advertisements were centered on smoking.

As time has passed, smoking has fallen out of fashion for many people, particularly because of the health risks associated with cigarette consumption.

If you like this article, we suggest you explore our most popular quotes article, a list of short inspirational quotes for daily encouragement. 

Read more related content on our inspirational quotes category page.

Quitting smoking quotes

1. “Be brighter, put down the lighter.” — Unknown

2. “You’re always better off if you quit smoking; it’s never too late.” — Loni Anderson

3. “I like smoking! I mean, God, I quit everything else, can’t I smoke?” — Melanie Griffith

4. “Get me well so I can get on television and tell people to stop smoking.” — Nat King Cole

5. “The best time to quit smoking was the day you started, the second best time to quit is today.” — Unknown

6. “To quit smoking, you must first want to quit, but then you must also do the quitting.” — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

7. “Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.” — Mark Twain

8. “I’ll give up smoking when I die, and I’ll settle down when I die. Until then, I’m gonna have a good time.” — Phil Rudd

9. “I’m more proud of quitting smoking than of anything else I’ve done in my life, including winning an Oscar.” — Christine Lahti

10. “Disadvantages of smoking are many but those of quitting are none. Advantages of smoking are none but those of quitting are many.” — Unknown

‘Smoking kills’ quotes

11. “Smoking is suicide by instalments.” — H.M. Forester

12. “Smoking: The most stylish way to cancer” ― Jitendra Attra

13. “Much smoking kills live men and cures dead swine.” — George Dennison Prentice

14. “Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.” — Brooke Shields

15. “Rather than you smoking a cigarette, the cigarette is really smoking you.” — Anthony Liccione

16. “My bladder cancer was related to smoking, and I think smoking kills people.” — Bob Schieffer

17. “A cigarette is the only consumer product which when used as directed kills its consumer.” — Gro Brundtland

18. “People always come up to me and say that my smoking is bothering them… Well, it’s killing me!” — Wendy Liebman

19. “Smoking kills you, but life kills you, and if you don’t want to die, go into a freezer when you are born and nothing will happen to you.” — Marjane Satrapi

20. “The true face of smoking is disease, death and horror – not the glamor and sophistication the pushers in the tobacco industry try to portray.” — David Byrne

People who want to smoke quotes

21. “Coffee and smoking are the last great addictions.” — Lara Flynn Boyle

22. “I do smoke in real life. A lot. We’re all smoking right now in fact.” — Michael Imperioli

23. “Quoting, like smoking, is a dirty habit to which I am devoted.” — Carolyn Gold Heilbrun

24. “I just don’t want anyone messing around with my pure smoking pleasure.” — Max Cannon

25. “I don’t want to quit smoking. I am convinced that if I quit smoking, the world would go to hell.” — Marjane Satrapi

26. “Smoking calms me down. It’s enjoyable. I don’t want politicians deciding what is exciting in my life.” — David Hockney

27. “If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don’t actually live longer; it just seems longer.” — Clement Freud

28. “So smoking is the perfect way to commit suicide without actually dying. I smoke because it’s bad, it’s really simple.” — Damien Hirst

29. “I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.” — Johnny Carson

30. “As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain from smoking when awake.” — Mark Twain

Smoking quotes about your health and body

31. “Impotence is one of the major hazards of cigarette smoking.” — Loni Anderson

32. “Smoking is hateful to the nose, harmful to the brain, and dangerous to the lungs.” — King James I

33. “I will go so far as to say probably smoking had something to do with my pancreatic cancer.” — Patrick Swayze

34. “Cigarette smoking is clearly identified as the chief, preventable cause of death in our society.” — C. Everett Koop

35. “I stopped smoking. When I stopped smoking, my voice changed… so drastically, I couldn’t believe it myself.” — Bob Dylan

36. “Every citizen who stops smoking, or loses a few pounds, or starts managing his chronic disease with real diligence, is caulking a crack for the benefit of us all.” — Mitch Daniels

37. “Tobacco smoke contains chemicals that weaken the body’s immune system, making it more susceptible to disease and handicapping its ability to destroy cancer cells.” — Michael Greger

38. “There are six components of wellness: proper weight and diet, proper exercise, breaking the smoking habit, control of alcohol, stress management and periodic exams.” — Kenneth H. Cooper

39. “Tobacco kills eight million people each year. This includes one million deaths from second-hand exposure. Today and every day, don’t let tobacco take your breath away!” — World Health Organization

40. “After years of denial and deception, the Philip Morris company has admitted that cigarette smoking causes lung cancer and other diseases. This formal acknowledgment comes far too late but still we must all welcome it. It can be the beginning of clearing the air.” — Bill Clinton

Sarcastic and funny smoking quotes

41. “Smoking is just like farting with the poisonous elements.” — Skai Chan 

42. “I found out that smoking is the leading cause of statistics.” — Matthew Gray Gubler

43. “I used to give up writing like some people would give up smoking.” — Octavia E. Butler

44. “People are so rude to smokers. You’d think they’d try to be nicer to people who are dying.” — Roseanne Barr 

45. “A troubled marriage can be as hazardous to physical health as cigarette smoking.” — Robert J. Waldinger

46. “I gave up smoking four years, two weeks, and five days ago. But who misses it?” — Sandra Scoppettone

47. “I was gonna focus on quitting smoking. But it turns out quitting smoking is stressful. And when I’m stressed-out, I smoke.” — Earl

48. “It’s official: Nicorette is the best cure for nicotine addiction. Just put a patch over each eye and you won’t be able to find your cigarettes.” — Brendan O’Carroll

49. “I stopped smoking. But my personality I still have. I get up in the morning, and not everybody loves me, so if you want to call that a bad habit, there’s that.” — Don Rickles

50. “I thought I couldn’t afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: ‘Oh well,’ and I went back to smoking again, and that was better.” — Benny Hill

The history and truth about smoking

Across the globe, in cultures on every continent, human beings have been consuming tobacco for generations.

However, what people consume now is not the same as the natural tobacco ancestors in the past may have enjoyed, such as natural tobacco in a ceremony or social event.

Modern data confirms the harmful side effects of consuming cigarettes.

It is understood that modern cigarettes and vaping pens contain harmful chemicals that harm the human body.

Yet, smoking is still popular with many demographics of our collective.

People are going to hold on to what makes them comfortable.

Some people like Marjane Satrapi, believe that “Smoking kills you, but life kills you, and if you don’t want to die, go into a freezer when you are born and nothing will happen to you.”

Life is about balance, and anything done without balance can turn into a harmful vice.

What do you think about smoking?

Let us know in the comments.